My Jewish Friend is Dying

Over the years we have received many calls from Christians with Jewish friends. It’s one of the main reasons we exist. We are here to help others share their faith with any Jewish person in their lives. 

After the usual words of introduction and hellos, all too often we hear the words from the caller, “My Jewish friend is dying.” Here’s the sad reality...though we are given the gift of life in Jesus, all too often we wait until the last moment to talk to those we love about Him. Perhaps this letter will encourage you to do something now.

Let me tell you a story. It happened several years ago, but the story is timeless and the lessons remain the same. Whether or not you have a Jewish friend, the principles in this newsletter apply to all. 

The call came from Terri regarding her Jewish friend, Judy. Judy had been diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer. The cancer was treated, went into remission, then came back with a vengeance. By the time they found it, the cancer had spread to her lungs. Her prognosis was not good. She declined any more chemotherapy. Judy was moved to her home with hospice care. Terri wanted me to come and visit Judy to talk to her about spiritual issues.

Thank God, Terri was open with Judy about spiritual issues over their many years of friendship. So, it was not as if Judy had never heard about Jesus or spiritual issues from Terri. But Judy had never heard from another Jewish person who believed in Jesus. That’s what Terri wanted from me.

Judy was never deeply interested in talking about spiritual issues, even with Terri. In fact, she was somewhat resistant, usually telling Terri, “I am not interested,” or just blatantly telling her, “I don’t want you to talk to me about Jesus.” Through the years Terri figured out a way to love Judy, respect her boundaries, and yet still somehow find ways to try to open up the spiritual doors. Now, Judy was on her deathbed.

Our first attempt at visiting Judy didn’t work out because she had to go into the hospital for some procedures. We made plans to go the next week. Terri and I met in the parking lot of a church and prayed. Under the circumstances, Terri did a good thing. She didn’t even tell Judy I was coming. I don’t usually recommend dropping in on people unannounced. However, in this instance, we couldn’t take the chance of Judy saying, “No.” So I went, hoping that I would get to talk to her. As Terri boldly said to me, “Murray, I have everything to gain and nothing to lose now.”What a brave statement!

Upon arriving at Judy’s, I sat in the kitchen for an hour. Judy did not want to see me at first. Her home hospice caretaker was there, and she wasn’t feeling up to talking to anyone. However, with Terri’s persistence, Judy invited me in.

I spent 30 enjoyable minutes with Judy. I was able to tell her about my life and how, as a Jewish person, I came to faith in Jesus. I explained that one does not stop being Jewish when they accept Jesus, and that I saw in Him the fulfillment of all of the Hebrew prophecies. She listened, she talked, and she was cordial. She even asked me how my parents responded when they found out about my faith. We had a sweet time.

Prior to leaving, I gave Judy a big hug and asked if I could come back and visit. She agreed, which was a miracle in itself. We planned a meeting for the next week. As I walked out of the door, I stopped and looked back at Judy. “Can I pray for you now?” I asked. “No,” she said. “You can pray for me when you leave.”I never saw Judy again.

A few days later I received a text from Terri: “Judy peacefully passed away about an hour ago with her son by her side. She will be greatly missed. Thank you for your prayers and caring for her soul. I did talk to her every day about Jesus and about how much God loves her. Thank you for your encouragement.”

Terri is a great example of one who bravely stepped out and spoke to her Jewish friend about Jesus from the beginning of their friendship. But it doesn’t always happen that way. Most people wait until the very end.

It’s human nature. We procrastinate, even with spiritual issues. We start to worry the closer we come to the end of our lives and the closer our friends get to the end of theirs. We begin to think about what we could, or should, say. Sometimes, however, the end of life creeps up on us more quickly than expected.

I sure wish people would call us sooner. By the time a Jewish person (or any person) gets into hospice, they are surrounded by family and friends. Then it is almost impossible to talk to them about spiritual issues. At that point in their life, most people are physically and mentally fatigued, on medication, and unable to listen.

It’s never too late to talk to someone about Jesus. The longer one waits to talk to a friend (or family member) about spiritual issues, the more difficult it can become. Sharing our faith is not only for the other person. Sharing our faith is for us as well. We have to step out of our personal comfort zones. It builds our faith. We learn to depend on Him more fully.

Sharing our faith with others matters because we all desire a kind of peace in grief. We want to mourn without the burden of wondering whether we did enough or could have done more. No one knows when someone might pass away, lose a job, or move on. Life is unpredictable. That’s why the Lord urges us to speak about Him now, while we have the opportunity.

God Puts People Into Our Lives For a Purpose

It’s no coincidence that if you have a Jewish person in your life, God brought them to you. He is involved in every aspect of our lives. He allows our circumstances. Those who come into our lives are a part of His divine plan. Our neighbors, business associates, and our family members are in our lives to challenge us to be more like Jesus. Don’t miss the opportunities that the Lord gives to you.

It is not easy to talk to people about spiritual issues, especially if the person is experiencing a life-threatening illness. However, it is exactly during those difficult times of life when people are most open to exploring spiritual issues. When did you come to Jesus? Were things going well? Or did you come to Him through a difficult circumstance? If you have a Jewish friend or family member, the Lord wants to use you to tell them about Him!

God Will Give Us The Words To Say

Most people do not talk to their friends about Jesus because they do not think they know what to say. They are afraid that if their friend responds negatively, they will not know how to respond. Most don’t engage because of feelings of inadequacy, ignorance, or fear. “Perhaps I will turn them off or lose them as a friend?”

Jesus encourages us. He tells us not to worry, that the Holy Spirit will give us the words to say. But if we don’t open our mouths, how can the Spirit speak through us? Remember that the same Lord who brings people into our lives will also give us the words to say.

Don’t Wait Until It’s Too Late

I recently received a call from John. He is a doctor who has a Jewish friend named Michael. Michael is a lawyer who does not yet know the Lord. John called me overwhelmed with the feeling that he has not done enough to share Jesus with his Jewish friend.

I asked John several questions about Michael. Was he searching? Having difficulty in life? Was his marriage okay? Had John ever talked to Michael about Jesus? John told me that Michael has “the world by the tail.” He has everything one could want—health, a beautiful wife, money, and very few problems. Michael is not open to the gospel and is not really searching, but he will talk.

I told John that one never knows when a friend may start their spiritual search. But one day Michael will, and John will be there. He will be prepared. And if, God forbid, Michael were to die suddenly, John would have done his job. I am so glad John came to us early. And I rejoice that Terri told Judy about Jesus!

It is our desire as a ministry to help as many people as we can to share their faith with their Jewish friends. We’ve been doing it for a long time and have the resources to help. If you have a Jewish friend or know someone who does, please reach out to us. 

By Murray Tilles

Founder and Executive Director